Friday, October 30, 2009

Aloha Friday

It's Aloha Friday over at An Island Life! Answer my question and make sure you post one on your blog! After that, go relax because today is Friday!!

My question for this week is: Why is it when you try to help someone out and let them live with you doing house work in exchange for rent do they have to be so dam useless.??

I dont have a answer.. my sister is homeless , jobless and goin thru a divorce.. I am on bed rest due to pregnancy complications and the hubby and I agreed she could stay here IF she would the things I needed help with .. SO why is it every time I ask her to do something SHE gets an attidude and she acts like she owns the place I have to ask permission in MY own house to use MY computer and MY t.v,, ERRR,, I feel bad cause she is the only Family i Have left.. WHAT TO DO??


  1. Really hard situation...I'm not sure why it is that "house guests" are that way, but it's usually worse with family. I broke my back when I was 24 and we had a friend of ours who needed a place to live. She moved in with the agreement that she would help keep the house tidy because I was unable to get up for one month...uggg! With a broken back, I was picking up after her. We had to hire a housekeeper just to keep up and she also was falling in love with my husband right before my eyes...awkward! LOL
    God bless you...I hope it gets better!

  2. that's a hard situation... but i say that despite of their own problems people have to be sensitive to your own too.. it's a two way kid of thing... if one of you guys won't deliver... it won't work... i guess you would talk to her and tell her how you feel.. not that she is obliged to do stuff for you...but she is your sister...and as you came to help her when she was jobless/homeless etc... she should also care that you need her to do stuff for you cause you're pregnant! if she gives an attitude.. i say you&your husband need to talk to her seriously... I'm just saying... but after all it's you call. I'm praying for wisdom for you guys to solve this situation maturely!


    *my Aloha Friday's up too:)

  3. I think there are people out there who are use to getting by thanks to the nice enablers like you and me.

    Happy Friday!

  4. We lived through that for 10 months! My SIL did not lift a finger to help. At first I figured she was depressed and thought nothing of asking. Finally, it wore really thin and we had to ask her to pay some rent or move out. She moved out. We still love her and she still speaks with us. On another note, I spent 5 months on hospital bed rest, no fun!

  5. maybe a reminder that she is a guest in your home is in order

    remind her you are on bed rest and don't need the stress she is causing you and she is there to help

    good luck

  6. omg, I'm laughing right now. Just in the phrasing of your question, what a hoot! I'm sorry your going through this. Just have her read the blog. Then maybe she'll get off her lazy ass. Or find another place. That's what I'd do. I wouldn't put up with that crap!

  7. Such a similar story! My mil came to help us when I was pregnant w/ the Princess. Hubby was supposed to be gone on a business trip to Japan but that was thankfully cancelled.

    I waited on her hand & foot & she couldn't understand why I was so upset. Um, hello? Pregnant w/ gigantour #2. Had to rest in the afternoons while my son was in pre-school & yet she complained to Hubby that I was being mean to her. For the first time Hubby could see what his mom had been doing to me behind his back for the past 11 yrs.

    Talk w/ her. Remind her how much you love her & need her. My thoughts & prayers are w/ you right now. It's tricky & hard. You can do this!

  8. There are always people that tend to fall more toward the "take" than the "give." I'm sorry one of them is living with you. You probably need to sit down with her and discuss it.

  9. I'm sorry about that. You shouldn't have to deal with such irresponsibility at this time when you need to not be more stressed than necessary.

    It is always hard to deal with family. It's so vulnerable because we hurt the people we love the most you know.

    However, there was a deal and it should be followed through.

    You and your sister and your husband need to have a sit down meeting and go over the rules again. You shouldn't be asking her to do what she agreed to. She is not a child. And she must be able to show restraint and care in your home as pertains to using your things. It's simply human acknowledgement of gratitude.

    I hope you get it all sorted out before your resentment turns into something worse.

  10. It is such a touchy situation. I am sorry you have to deal with this.

  11. I hate when people take advantage of kindness...
    Good Luck with this...