productive but sad day

well to bad today isn't Monday cause my home is singing like George strait at a rodeo..lol.. i got everything *just imagine* on my to do list DONE!!! all i have to do tomorrow is put away all the laundry i folded and basic sweeping and pick up. also today i finished my remembrance bag and we packaged up baby Micah and buried the baby under a really nice shaded tree and hubby made a stone and i will be taking pics of the stone tomorrow.i also took pics of "Micah" but dont think i want to share them, so im drained..and i cant sleep , i thought i was "over" the loss of the baby but i guess not. I m sad for the loss but also for the child i will never know.all the first i have seen with both miah and gus and how this little one would have fit in with my other two kiddo. and even if this baby was a boy or girl? or what it would have looked like . so im a little sad but i also know that my baby is in heaven with my dad and his is playing with his grandchild for the first time. That is one thing that makes me so sad when i look at my kids is that they wont know what a great man thier poppa tom was..and how much i KNOW he would spoil them. I also know that god gives and takes away and only he know the reason so while i have accepted the baby's death im not happy with it.. hopefuly god blesses us with more children and if now we will raise the ones we have to love him anyway. we have permanatly said goodby to birthcontrol and to our little peanut..